By Beverly Cobain and Jean Larch
Book Review by Jean Johnson

For this month’s review, I want to focus on the topic of suicide. Especially, since I know several mothers whose children made a drastic decision in the moment of great pain to end their life.

Personally, I don’t feel anyone would end their lives if it weren’t for intense emotional pain that takes over rational thought and decisions. We can’t see the internal conflicts and pressure they experience as they try to hide their emotions from friends and family, pretending happiness, while dying inside. They just want to be free of pain. Nothing else at that moment feels real. My heart hurts for these mom’s incredible loss and struggle with the “why’s” of their child’s death.

I discovered this book while searching the topic of suicide. I believe this compilation of personal stories will help to answer some of the nagging questions that haunt parent’s thoughts. I especially liked the analogy of “A Jar of Stones.” This is a word picture of inner feelings not expressed by the one who ends their life. This book is well written and comes from the perspective of scientific understanding and life experiences of losing a child to suicide.

Dennis Liegghio, member of the “Student Driver Band” shares a poignant song included in this book, born out of his own father’s suicide.  Here is an excerpt from their song, “No Resolve.”

So this is how you leave, bleeding where I stand.
I’ve tried so hard to figure out, I’ve tried to understand.
What could have been so #$%&@** painful?
What was it that made you feel that it had to end?
What was that final piece, you couldn’t get to fit?
Did you take a minute to stop and think, how we would deal with it?
There will be no answer to these questions. We’ve got to carry on and try to live…..

The rest is in the book.  Listen to this song.

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Jean Johnson – Jean’s grief journey began in October 2006 when her daughter was murdered.  Jean knows the value of self-help through reading and wants to encourage others to read as well.  When she finds a book that she believes will help others, she writes a review to encourage them to seek it out and invest their time in reading as a means of healing after loss.